STOP TRYING TO BE ARTISTIC, PEOPLE!



Stop Trying. Lately, people on “the good ole ‘net” have been attempting to be artistic. At least 99.9% of these people are failing. Failing miserably.

Are you trying to really impress all of your friends on your MySpace, Xanga, or Adult Friend Finder profile? I know, I know… I feel for you. You want everyone to see YOUR site and think, “Wow, this really is nice. This person is truly a unique individual. I really want to be like them. I think I will mail them some money. Maybe I will even consider marrying them one day.”

No one thinks that. Everyone thinks your background sucks and you have no taste in art design. People from all over the world see your profile and (at best) contemplate suicide.

People starving in Eastern Europe? Dying from AIDS in Africa?

Nope. A couple of Bosnian refugees just logged onto your MySpace page and couldn’t take it anymore. Nice going, murderer.

And yes, they do have Internet over there. Where do you think LimeWire and all of the Bit Torrent sites are based? Not in the western hemisphere, that’s for sure.

Maybe you should think about Americans and our illegal copyright violations before you start killing off the people that make that kind of thing possible. Stop with the inane “artistic designs.” Just delete your “website.” No one really likes it anyway.

Okay, I admit, maybe I’m taking this a little too far. Maybe I’m even being kind of mean.

And you probably have a few questions.

For example, you’re probably wondering, “LOLZ DARYL HOW CAN I MAKE SURE I DON’T HAVE ONE OF THESE GAY WEBSITES??!!”

Easy.

1. Does your website have the code < font size=1 > ANYWHERE on it?

2. In order to read your website’s “content”, does the text need to be highlighted?

3. Has anyone ever sent you a message telling you that, after viewing your website, they plan on taking their life?



If you said “yes” to any of these, you are killing people and your “website” needs to be deleted. And then overwritten so that once you go back into your semi-retarded state of mind, there will be no way for it to be recovered.

Please, think of all of the third world countries that provide us with an endless supply of illegal movies, music and TV shows. Don’t make that go away. Delete your website.

Thank you.